so i'm back to the velvet underground... back to the gypsy that i was..

hew.. hew.. you see your gypseeeh...

stevie nicks, man! her voice personifies unaffected cool and passion combined. i love the way she sang those melancholy lyrics from the seventies. i've never really paid much attention to her music before, but now it excites me just thinkin' about putting my earphones and turning my iPod on to the easy flow of Fleetwood Mac. I guess its just a matter of "mood" that defines what we like.

Right now it suits me. That song 'landslide'. It took my love, it took it down.

I'm in sort of a dark, melancholy mood these days. My world is black with red highlights. I've unknowingly turned myself into a goth. I went shopping a few days ago, right? Bought a bunch of shirts and a pair of jeans. I hurried home to unfurl the gifts that i treated myself to, right? And what did i see? Monochrome. Black. It's scorching hot summer and I'm in black. It's not like I told myself to ignore all the other colors and just pick out the black ones. It just sort of... came together like that. It's like I'm mourning something. The death of love. Well, it's not exactly dead yet. But dusk is just about setting in on it.

I'm not so sad about it though. I used to be, but now I think I'm ready to shake it off. Sadness gets boring too at some point. I'm not on the prowl for another one, either. I'm just letting it ride and slide easy. I'm savoring this solitude.

I know, I know. You might say I'm in denial, right? what with all the black in my wardrobe. But that's just a preference, y'know? A fashion statement. It says fuck you, I'm back to being myself. Back to the gypsy that I was...

I still believe love lingers. But just like everything else, it changes too. And it makes me happy that I understand that. =) The madness fades but love still lingers on...

the infinity of space

Life does play tricks on us mortals. I was just thinking how infatuation disappears within a blink of an eye, leaving you saying to yourself: "What the hell happened there?!" You fantasize and you pine for somebody for weeks at a time (months even), thinking about the future and holding hands and romantic revelations... and in just one ordinary night (nothing special, mind you,) you're driving down the road with headlights flashing in your eyes, and for no apparent reason you realize that that person you've been going crazy about is actually... not worth the effort.

He was too selfish and I think I'm too special(haha)!

And only yesterday I thought I loved him enough to do anything.

I address this message to all of you who are left sad and lonely...

This is not the end, you brave soul.

Imagine the infinity of possibilities that can happen to you.